In order to have a successful relationship, we, as partners, both agree that we each have certain rights, as well as responsibilities, to uphold in our partnership. In accepting that reality, we affirm, to the best of our abilities, that:
• We will each accept responsibility for our own actions.
• We will assume that our partners tried the best they knew how when something goes wrong.
• If things don’t go our way, we won’t blame each other.
• We will accept the fact that stuff happens and that things in life don’t always go the way we wanted them to go.
• We will always attempt to find a common solution to our problems.
• When we cannot find a common solution to our problems, we will seek outside help.
• We will not sacrifice for each other, but rather, we will find a solution to our relationship issues that benefits both of us.
• We will never attack each other’s character or motivations.
• We will treat each other with common dignity even when we are angry.
• We will share our thoughts and feelings and will take time to discuss what really matters to us without withholding any of the essentials.
• We will check in with each other to see if either one of us is harboring fears that we have not yet articulated.
• We will look to the future and try to imagine how things will be when we have worked through our relationship problems and the real world issues that we are facing.
• We will work toward our shared vision of the future rather than harboring resentments about what happened in the past.
• We will not worry about our relationship, but rather, we will let our relationship lead us to discover new aspects of our selves and the world.
• In doing these things, we will treat each other as family and friends.
• If things are improving in our relationships, we will celebrate.
• If things are not improving in our relationship, we will seek help from a psychologist or another relationship professional.
• We will be optimistic about our relationship and see it as a win/win situation regardless of what happens and what the future brings our way.
These guidelines can give us direction in the future, and we can turn to them to affirm our relationship at any time. We understand that our relationship is a work in progress and that some of these rights and responsibilities will take time to actualize.
The Relationship Bill of Rights and Responsibilities is based on a study of high-functioning couples. Highlighted here are the things they do to make their relationships exciting and meaningful.
If you want to work toward learning how to do these things, let me show you how. Get my book, Low Stress Romance. It will simplify your journey. If you need help, Talk To Me about it.
*The Relationship Bill of Rights and Responsibilities. Copyright 2009 Dr. Billy Lee Kidd. From the book Low Stress Romance. Copy for personal use only. For commercial use, contact Romantic Relationship Institute, LLC.