By Dr. Cornelia Gibson Believe it or not, women—well, most of us, or let’s say, some of us—would not mind submitting to the man in our life. What we are really afraid of is the man abusing that power or leading us down a dead end street. The expression “a happy wife, a happy life” is so true. We would give anything to the man in our life if the giving was mutual. However, so often once the man is happy then that is the end of the giving.
Who’s intimidating who?
I would not necessarily say that men are intimidated by us successful women. Rather, I would say that men believe they have to do more, make more, and be more than us. In reality, we are not trying to change men. Surprise, surprise! But men start feeling they are valued less, while at the same time, feeling pressure to do more. However, I have secretly been told that the pressure comes from within themselves and from their friends. When a man is comfortable with who he is and what he is—and I might add, whose he is—then the intimidation factor does not come in to play. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it!
I have personal experience with a relationship in which he, the man of the house, felt pressure to do what I was doing. When I started to continue my education, so did he. He took two classes and dropped out. Both starting and stopping was his choice. I supported him and stood behind him in both of these decisions. His friends however taunted him in the beginning. They told him that he was just trying to keep up with me. Then these friends told him that he was going to lose me to someone more educated. I loved him for who he was, but he started believing all the idiotic outside influences. Let’s face it, he needed new friends. They were not very supportive. I have other examples about friendship, but you can only find them in my novel, Surviving Broken Promises. I know—I’m such a tease!
Questions and Answers
Q: Where are all the men?
A: That’s what we want to know.
Q: Are you intimidated by us?
A: We think not.
Q: Do you want us to slow down and be less than our full potential?
A: We won’t.
Q: You want us to submit?
A: We will if you’re worth it and you understand it’s a two-way street.
Q: Where are all the women?
A: Sitting at home because a man has not asked us out. However, some of us have no problem asking the man out, we just choose not because it’s easier that way.
Dr. Cornelia Gibson holds doctorate degrees in counseling psychology and education. She has written a fiction novel about relationship issues that both men and women have found interesting, funny, entertaining. It also has initiated many relationship debates.
Dr. Gibson’s ten-plus years of education taught her how to listen to both sides of a story and make both sides feel comfortable rather than attacked. Many of her male friends have told her that she is a good listener and that she doesn’t talk too much. She tells men, “Please don’t compare me with the women in your lives—humph—because with over $100,000 in student loans. I would hope I have learned something useful, non-intimating, and—delicious!”
Dr. Gibson is currently working on a stage play called Surviving Broken Promises. Her web site is Surviving Broken Promises.